We all know sometimes I speak too quickly.
We sure do all know that. So I’m volunteering to let everyone come up with the best examples of me speaking too quickly and making an ass of myself. What can I say? I’m in a haircoat kind of mood and think there’s probably some fun to be had in thinking of how many stupid things I’ve done. (In my defense, some of them are really quite funny. Not a moral justification, but at least an aesthetic one.) Take advantage of this offer as quite possibly by next week I’ll be in a mood where I’ll think you all should stop being so needlessly critical of me. Plus, those of you who play along get the added bonus of me apologizing yet again for what I did wrong. Which would be what? The 956th time for some of you, no? (Another fun game would be to count how many people I’ve apologized to enough times they finally started apologizing to me after reconsidering the situation.)
Now that I think of it, though, we’ll set the game so that you’ll also get special points for coming up with unusually cold things I’ve said to people who certainly deserved the insults they were given, when the insults were surprisingly accurate and entertaining. This part of the contest we’ll relate to the very different quotation below.
I don’t give a fuck if my words have grown old:
I’ve never been so willing to see a relationship fray.
I don’t give a fuck how thin this ice has become:
I’m stomping on it anyway.
Send all contest submissions to jmw@johnmyleswhite.com.